The Latest Dating Trend and how to spot and confront a Wokefish

When it comes to dating, most people look for someone who shares similar core values and beliefs. It can be difficult for an atheist and a devout religious person to have a successful relationship, especially if they plan on having children. Similarly, dating someone with opposing political views can also prove challenging in today’s politically charged environment.

A 2020 survey by Dating.com found that 84% of daters won’t date someone with different political beliefs and 67% have ended a relationship due to differing views. With increased political division in the US, it is not surprising that individuals with liberal views may want to avoid those with conservative views and vice versa.”Wokefishing” occurs when someone online claims to be liberal, but upon further conversation, their beliefs and actions do not align with those of a liberal individual.

Defining Wokefish

Wokefishing is a tactic used by some individuals to present themselves as holding progressive views as a means of attracting romantic partners, according to Vice writer Serena Smith. This may include claiming to be supportive of sex positivity, anti-racism, pro-choice, and even attending protests that align with these beliefs, when in reality they do not hold these views. It is similar to catfishing, but the deception is based on political beliefs rather than financial or personal gain.

The term “woke” has been in use since 1972, but has gained more attention in recent years. It refers to being aware of and addressing systemic injustices in society. The term has been used in the political sphere, with Florida Governor Ron DeSantis proposing the “Stop Woke” law, which has faced legal challenges.

“Manipulators may pretend to align with the beliefs of their potential partner, including political views, in order to gain control and influence,” says love coach Sophie Thomas. This can happen even when there are significant differences in political beliefs, such as a Trump supporter dating someone who is “woke.” However, once the manipulator has gained control, their true intentions and beliefs may become clear.

How to avoid being wokefished

When we’re given information, we take it at face value because, honestly, it’s hard to believe that someone would lie about their political affiliation, especially in this political environment. In fact, it can take months or even years for someone’s true political identity to emerge, then you’re standing there realizing you’ve officially been wokefished .

“This cognitive dissonance has some surprising behavioral side effects, including wokefishing. I tell my clients to look for matches based on shared values. However, if someone is misrepresenting their views just to bring in dates, the connection is starting off on a lie and people could be subjected to a lot of go-nowhere conversation about the issues, and a broken heart.”

If someone claims to be anti-racist, but makes a racist statement, perhaps dismissing it as a joke, that may be a red flag. If you also notice them rolling their eyes during a conversation about women’s reproductive rights, that could mean something too. It really comes down to looking for clues as to who your date really is and being ready to move on if it becomes clear that they’re a wolf in sheep’s clothing.